President of Uganda

V/O Ladies and Gentlemen…the President of...Uganda


My people. People of Uganda. Times have been hard. The rains have not fallen, the drought goes on and the civil war which ravaged our country has left our economy in ruins. Despite this you have supported me through the adversity, though it must have seemed as if it would never end.

But now my people, good people of Uganda our salvation has come and the misfortune will end.

My people…

I have received an "E-mail" from the President of Nigeria!

Saying he requests the privilege to transfer the sum of $47 million dollars into our coffers. I was concerned the messsages authenticity however the President himself, signing this email as "the President of Uganda" which is indeed his title, and he tells me that it NOT a hoax. It is in fact a once in a lifetime opportunity. I and for one agree with him.

I have passed him our nation bank account details and the PIN number to the state treasury credit card as they have asked. As a sign of good faith I shall also send them our gold and jewels.

Finally my people I have received another email, the suffering and the infertility that ravaged not only the soils of our nation but also its loins. I have received many many more emails from the kind people of the world offering to enlarge our penises. Ugandans…you can stand tall again!
Pe-ness!
Pe-ness!